Love... Unconditional? - Perpetual Melody

Ok... this one’s about Unconditional Love. Can it ever be unconditional?

The only relationship that comes to my mind when I hear about unconditional love is parental love. Probably there’s nothing as unconditional as that. Also, while we talk about a mother’s love, we ignore father’s love!! I don’t understand why?! Fathers are an adorable lot too, and their love is no less unconditional than a mother’s!

Parents may not agree with everything we do, but we can trust them to be on our side no matter what... and there’s no way we can repay them! Also, they may not expect monetary or material returns from us. But they DO expect a warm smile and respect, don’t they? They DO expect us to follow certain norms of acceptable social behaviour, don’t they? If we fail to do all this they may still stand by you, but it would bruise their love.

Talking about romantic love, I don’t really believe that unconditional love exists. I had penned something down a few days back:

we give off something
of ourselves
for love.
we often capitulate
negating our own needs.

i may do it,
but is it what i want?
i may do it,
but do i cease to hope?
do i want to nurture pain?

NO.

i thrive on barter
i expect
i want
i deserve.

Love is conditional, more often than not, and there’s a price for everything.

I’m referring to the scenario when you love incessantly and whole-heartedly, and that love is not reciprocated back. It hurts. As you give love, you may keep negating your own needs of love, but get nothing in return other than pain... in such a case, would you want to keep yourself open to pain? (Though you may still continue to love that person and live with that pain & despair. But would you want to immerse your life in that grief?) How many times have you advised your buddies to let go abusive, un-fulfilling relationships? I’m sure you’ve lost count. And you advice so because you want to see them happy.

We all *talk* about giving and sacrificing for the sake of love and our beloved (I’m referring to romantic love only). Yes, we do sacrifice. But can we really detach hope from love? Can you continue to love your partner with the same intensity when you know he/she is cheating on you, or does not love you back in return, or does not respect you? I don’t think so. When we give love and respect, don’t we also command respect and expect love?

I say so because I am no saint... like most normal people, I expect love when I give love. I am no Mira to be happy just loving her Shyaam, and expecting nothing in return. That’s the reason why Mira sets an example, not me

Homo Sapiens are basically a very lonely species... social, but yet lonely... we all want a companion in the long run... we all need that special someone, we naturally expect that love and companionship, and deserve it too... it is always mutual, never one-way... there’s an inherent barter system there.

I loved Mayuri’s (a ryze friend) take on unconditional love:
'We love unconditionally' is what so many say...
You don't even realize in how many ways they make you pay...

Isn’t it true? I think that very well summarizes all!